My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles

By which I actually mean my favourite blogs, webcomics, etcetera. It’s been a while so I thought an update might be in order…

Blogs
Boing Boing – The grandaddy of all ‘random cool stuff ‘ blogs. Be sure to check out the submitterator for upcoming random cool stuff (and – depending on how well the spam filter’s working – promotional articles about public injury lawyers in Toad Suck Oklahoma).
Warren Ellis – They call him “Internet Jesus”.
Hyperbole and a Half – Rarely updated recently for various reasons, but wonderful. The tale of moving the dogs cross-country made me laugh so hard I almost passed out (literally).
Strange Maps – Exactly what it says on the tin.
Building Blog – Urban speculation and wild flights of fancy
The Worst of Perth – Everything that’s wrong with our fair city.
Not Always Right – Insane customer service stories.
Lamebook – I don’t have a Facebook account. This is one of the reasons why.
Regretsy – Fat, jealous losers critique the astonishing garbage and mass produced  crap people attempt to sell through ‘crafting’ site Etsy.
Studies in Crap – The finest in forgotten and bewildering crap.

Comics
Bad Machinery – Continuing strange goings on in the Midlands town of Tackleford. The current plot involves selkies (one of my favourite types of mythical beasts…)
Gunnerkrigg Court – Continuing strange goings on in a very unusual school.
Dresden Codak – Transhumanism, cyborgs and amazing artwork. An Ayn Rand analogue has just shown up, which should be… interesting.
Romantically Apocalyptic – Post-nuclear madness and (more) amazing  artwork. You shall obey Zee Captain!
XKCD – Wonderful geekiness.
Girl Genius – Ongoing gaslight fantasy adventures (don’t call it steampunk! They don’t like it!)
Wondermark – Recycling Victoriana into surrealism. Tusky McMammoth is my favourite.
Subnormality – Observations on the human condition. And Sphinxes.
Scandinavia and the World – What if countries were people? Stupid people?

There you go. That should keep y’all occupied.

Kony

Is Joseph Kony a monster who needs to be brought to justice? Yes.

Is it good that the central African conflict is getting some attention for once? Yes.

Is Kony responsible for everything that’s wrong with central Africa? No.

Will capturing Kony solve central Africa’s problems and turn everything to sweetness and light and happiness with unicorns and ice cream? Hell no.

Are parts of the Invisible Children video inaccurate, outdated and misleading? Hell yes.

Don’t imagine for a second that putting up a poster, liking something on Facebook or pinning blame on one man is going to ‘save’ the people of central Africa. Do some research into just how complex and fethed up the conflict/region is, hold off on buying that new smartphone, and then get back to me.

The Extra Clever Mongoose

I am a freak. I have hands and I have feet, and if you saw me you’d faint, you’d be petrified, mummified, turned into stone or a pillar of salt!

Picked up a copy of J.K.Rowling’s Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them the other day, and I really have to ask, was Gef a Jarvey?

That is all.

Sir, have you no Latin?

It’s “Cuss-toe-dez” and “A-star-tez” thank you very much!

I was listening to a couple of 40k podcasts over the weekend (it’s kind of taken over my brain at the moment – don’t panic, it’ll burn itself out after a while), specifically 40k Radio and the Independent Characters. Both were very informative and entertaining and I’ll probably be adding them to my podcast-roll permanently – however there was just one little thing that got my teeth on edge…

Someone (I can’t ever remember which podcast they were on, let alone which of the participants) mentioned that they were considering building an Adeptus Custodes army. This is a fine idea and would look damned awesome on the table top, the problem was that they kept calling the Custodes “Cus-toads”. CUS-TOADS!!

Emperor on a Mobility-Scooter! What next? Calling the Space Marines “Ass-tarts”?

This is what happens when an entire nation takes perfectly serviceable words like “colour” and “realise” and spells them the way they’re actually pronounced! LINGUISTIC ANARCHY!!! 😉

The Head of Emily Kaye

The Dead Eyes Opened. The Dead Eyes Opened. The Dead Eyes Opened. The Dead Eyes Opened.

Ever since I first encountered the Severed Head’s classic proto-techno track Dead Eyes Opened as a teenager I’ve wondered if the narration was cut from the whole cloth or if it referred to a real murder…

Today, after many attempts over the years, I finally figured it out.

The spoken work component is from a radio broadcast of crime writer Edgar Lustgarten reading his account of what was known as the Crumbles Murder in which one Patrick Mahon murdered his mistress Emily Kaye in a beach cabin near Eastbourne, Sussex in 1924.

So there we go. One mystery down, so many to go…

Me China Mel Dancin’

My good friend Mel is dancing…

Doo-doo-doo-doo,
Yeah yeah yeah yeah-eah,

Yemen and his Igor photo me,
I’m on the phone, yous can each foresee,
Cool me down,
Rinse a mouse in front of me,
(front of me)
So that’s the way I felt then wa-ah-ah,
So we can eat a Hilton, la la la,
You’re so mean,
See there the melody,

Oh-wow-o-wow-ow,

Dance on the oars,
Cat fight in a handbag,
Yours, only yours,
A walrus tickle dance bed,
It’s no lie,
Lisa in the crown said,
Meh, anyhow,
Me china Mel dancin’

Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow-ow-ow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow-ow-ow,

Me I’m flocking home giving up for stoats,
As I’m coming down I slip the ropes,
Cool me down,
The TARDIS taking over yeah,
(oh-wow-ow-wow-ow)
So that’s the way I felt then, wa-ah-ah,
So we can eat a Hilton, la-la-la,
You’re so mean,
See there the melody,

So come on,
Dance on the oars,
Cat fight in a handbag,
Yours, only yours,
A walrus tickle dance bed,
It’s no lie,
Lisa in the crown said,
Meh, anyhow,
Me china Mel dancin’

Dance on the oars,
Cat fight in a handbag,
Yours, only yours,
A walrus tickle dance bed,
It’s no lie,
Lisa in the crown said,
Meh, anyhow,
Me china Mel dancin’

Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow-ow-ow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow,
Oo-oo-oo-wow-o-wow-ow-ow,

So come on,
Dance on the oars,
Cat fight in a handbag,
Yours, only yours,
A walrus tickle dance bed,
It’s no lie,
Lisa in the crown said,
Meh, anyhow,
Me china Mel dancin’

Dance on the oars,
Cat fight in a handbag,
Yours, only yours,
A walrus tickle dance bed,
It’s no lie,
Lisa in the crown said,
Meh, anyhow,
Me china Mel dancin’

Apathy

Apathy is sad.

I have a list of things to do as long as my arm, but can’t seem to get motivated to do any of them.

I just sit around surfing the net and watching TV.

I think it’s some kind of psychological hangover from my failed holiday – the brutal come down from all excitement and anticipation, combined with anxiety about the amount of money I’ve lost.

I hope I’ll snap out of it soon, but in the meantime you’ll all have to forgive me for being a dull, inactive, inattentive bastard.

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