CHOGM, Resin Skulls and Stephen Fry

An update

I think I promised a blog update this weekend didn’t I?

It’s kind of difficult to keep up with the blogging at the moment because the old black dog is nipping at my heels again – quite badly as a matter of fact. A lot of the time all I want to do is sleep. I’ve actually tested that out, to see if it makes things better, but it doesn’t really – I just wake up tired and fuzzy headed with my mouth feeling like the bottom of a lion cage, so it’s down to the tried and true methods of eating right, trying to get more exercise and doing my best to get out and be social, despite the fact that I’d rather be unconscious. No doubt I’ll pull out of it sooner or later, but in the meantime it’s not much fun.

In any case for those not in the know this was CHOGM week in Perth, when the heads of the Commonwealth nations descended on the city like a horde of Elder Gods, dragging hordes of vile servitors in their wake, and the Yog Sothoth of this abominable crew, Her Majesty the Queen (and her personal Nyarlathotep, Prince Phillip) also stopped in to say hi and attend a barbecue.

We’ve been preparing for this for months, and in the end it’s all been a bit of an anticlimax. Some roads were shut down, some exclusion zones were set up, some protesters waved placards and some civil liberties were casually abused in the name of security, and then it was all over. Some interesting things were done – the laws of Royal succession were altered to favour the first born child regardless of gender for instance – and some important things argued about and ultimately ignored (such as agreeing to give Commonwealth citizens a few basic human rights) and then it was all over. Ho Hum.

The big event for we peasants was the barbecue on the foreshore yesterday. It was the typical public event thing, everyone milling around for a few hours waiting for the Monarch and Royal Consort to put in an appearance, which they eventually did for a while before leaving without so much as eating a sausage (although Prince Phillip played with some barbecue tongs). On the plus side public transport was free across the entire city all day, which I took advantage of to catch up with Rebecca and Dom and the kids at Siennas in Mount Lawley for lunch. Strangely though, despite the free transport the railway was shut down between Perth Underground and Esplanade. If you asked they’d probably say they were concerned about someone trying to pull a V for Vendetta and blow up the Gleddon Building from below, but I suspect the real reason was that they’d either bailed up the city’s homeless in the tunnel to prevent the sight of them offending the Queen, or the Mole Men were holding their own CHOGM barbecue down there. Maybe both.

But anyway, it’s all over now and CHOGM ephemera is now selling for decent bucks on eBay.

I’ve been playing around with casting this weekend. I needed some large Adeptus Mechanicus symbols for some 40k terrain I’m sporadically working on, and a search of the net indicated that no one makes them anywhere and hence they’re quite hard to come across and rather expensive when you do. So I said, to hell with you, I’ll make my own people! Or rather my own AdMech symbols. I built a master out of plywood, plasticard and the general debris that a natural hoarder such as myself invariably accumulates, made a latex mould from it and have been merrily turning out cogwheels-with-skulls willy nilly all weekend. I’m almost tempted to make some extra ones and sell them on eBay, but I suspect Games Workshop’s lawyers would come down on me like the hammer of Sigmar and I’d never be heard from again. Oh well, I have what I came for πŸ™‚

Last weekend of course it was QI Live at the Burswood theatre. I’d assembled a small group to attend consisting of myself, Katie, Justin and Marika. I met up with Justin and Marika at the Atrium buffet before the show which, despite the fact that it was stupidly expensive and they threw us out at 7:30 (they close for half an hour on Friday and Saturday evenings – no idea why but I suppose it’s not for the likes of me to criticise the behaviour of the wealthy) was fantastic. I was particularly fond of the beef and mushroom ragout, and the desert bar was absolutely sumptuous. We then met up with Katie outside the theatre before proceeding in to our seats.

Our seats were in the very back row of the ground floor and, surprisingly, turned out to be excellent. Sure, we were about as far from the stage as it was possible to get, but our view was completely unobstructed. We could also listen in to the chatter of the stage-management guys just across the aisle, which was most amusing when one of the guests’ microphones failed and they had to improvise a solution. We also heard the final scores a few second before everyone else, for what it was worth πŸ™‚

The show was excellent. Entertaining and informative in equal measure. It was a bit shambolic, what with being the very first QI Live ever, but that was part of the fun. Stephen Fry regaled us with tales of his first visit to Perth (the phrase “eastern states or overseas” will never sound the same again) and Alan Davies hammed it up for the crowd, despite being seriously ill (or at least claiming that he was seriously ill, there was a lot of mention of ‘slurry’). The guests were Colin Lane, Denise Scott and some guy who I’ve never heard of, but who did a decent enough job despite being the victim of the aforementioned microphone failure.

If there was one problem it was that it did drag on a bit. The show didn’t finish until just before 11:00, and Justin even fell asleep in his sear despite the regular klaxon whenever Alan Davies tried to answer a question (he had been up since 4:00 though so it’s quite understandable). I imagine they’ll get the hang of balancing amusing blather with keeping things moving in future performances, but it was a small price to pay for the privilege of being there for the show’s first outing.

Once it was all over we dumped our plan of going somewhere for drinks (Justin was just about dead on his feet and I wasn’t far behind) and Katie and I wandered around what seemed like all of Burswood looking for a taxi before stumbling over one who’s driver was just as lost looking for the taxi rank as we were.

So, a good night was had by all, despite being informed that the first European to discover Australia recommended that it be named “New Zealand” πŸ˜‰

Hmmm, that’s all I’ve got to say. There’s cleaning I have to do, and after that I’m tempted to see if that sleep thing might finally work πŸ™‚

Just the End of the World Again

Yeah, like they’d take *me*

Just realised, it’s the 21st! It’s the end of the world! Again!

I’m kind of disappointed there’s no media frenzy like there was the last time. We all had so much fun waiting for earthquakes, angels and tsunamis to sweep across the globe. This time people don’t seem to care at all. Such a shame.

Wonder what old Harold will do if (when) nothing happens? You’ve got to feel a bit sorry for the poor bastard really.

In other news I’m off to see Stephen Fry and Alan Davies in the live version of QI tonight. Should be awesome – assuming I’m not swept up in the rapture first ;D

The Slap

I’ll give *you* a slap!

The ABC is going on and on and on about it’s ‘brilliant’ new drama The Slap.

The media are going on and on and on about the ABC’s ‘brilliant’ new drama The Slap.

As far as I can tell the ABC’s ‘brilliant’ new drama (The Slap) consists of…

1) Person slaps child….
2) Everyone gets angsty about it.

Call me autistic but that sounds like the most batshit boring eight hours of television ever envisaged by man.

And what’s all this about La Paglia the Younger being an unknown? He was the star of 7 Days you ignorant savages! Just because you have no interest in giant blue time-travel spheres and oddly cold-war influenced pro-American storylines doesn’t make the guy an unknown!

Sheeze!

Ghosts and Grunts

Extraorrrrrrrdinary tales of the undead

Many years ago, when I was in primary school, there was a book in the school library that caused a bit of a stir. It was a collection of (allegedly) true Australian ghost stories.

I can’t recall much about the contents. It probably included all the usual suspects such as Frederici at the Princess Theatre and Fisher’s ghost. But there was one chapter that started up a whole load of trouble – one about a bunch of quite terrifying events alleged to have occurred to a bunch of kids on a school camp at the Old York Hospital.

This caused quite a ruckuss. It was all anyone would talk about. In creative writing class, all anyone would write were stories about ghosts and (for some reason) ninjas and kung-fu on school camping trips to the Old York Hospital. The situation got so bad that the year seven school camp was cancelled out of fear that the students would run off to go ghost hunting (or possibly ninja hunting). The fact that it was a fairly conservative Catholic primary school with a dim view of all things “occult” probably didn’t help matters either – I think the book eventually vanished from the shelves never to be seen again before the whole thing eventually died down.

It did however leave me with a lifelong curiosity about the old hospital, and when a photographer on Flickr got in touch with me this week about the old Castle Fun Park in Mandurah, and I noticed some photos of the hospital in her photostream, I decided to do some research about the story I remembered as a kid. And I found the motherload!

First up I located a lengthy article about the events at the old hospital by one Miriam Howard-Wright. The article was published in a magazine, but I strongly suspect that the book that caused such a stir so many years ago was written by her, with the article reworked into the notorious York chapter.

I also found a fantastic old documentary about Australian hauntings up on YouTube. Broadcast in the 1980s it very likely sparked the Old-York-Hospital mania I remember so well. The video transfer is a bit off, and it’s heavily infused with a rather 1970s “the paranormal is now a serious subject of scientific enquiry” vibe, but it’s still a damn good watch. One of the most entertaining aspects of it is actually the accents – the narrator appears to be English (presumably on the basis that no one could possibly take a documentary narrated by an Australian seriously) and there are a couple of examples of the old “refined” Australian accent which is now nearing extinction (such as the woman at the info centre in the Rocks). The sheer preponderance of cigarettes also shows how much the country’s changed in the last 30 years.

Finally I stumbled over another documentary, this one from 2001, about Australia’s “Most Haunted Town” (apparently Kapunda). It’s hosted by Warrick Moss, who made his mark in the field by hosting 90s paranormal infotainment classic The Extraorrrrdinary (you have to say it like that – it’s the way he did it). It’s nothing particularly ground-breaking, but gets my vote for the second half, which consists almost wholly of shaky-cam, infra-red footage of Moss stumbling around in the dark, grunting (and swearing). Now that’s entertainment!

One of these days I’ll make it to York…

Together in Electric Dreams

Smart, but weird.

Man buys a computer to design a new kind of brick. Man spills champagne on the computer. The computer becomes sentient and goes all Fatal Attraction on him…

Yes, I’m talking about the movie Electric Dreams. It’s pretty stupid, but back in the first, early dawn of personal computing anything seemed possible. And as divorced from reality as the film may have been, it at least gave us this scene, which is one of the best classical/Eighties-electronic-pop mashups ever recorded.

(My new monitor is teh awesomes by the way)

Her Mother Teresa Young Humanitarian of the Year Award

It’s even funnier with an Irish accent.

I’ve really been enjoying Misfits lately.

For those not in the know, it’s British series about a bunch of young offenders on community service who get caught in a mysterious lightning storm and develop super-powers. If this were an American series they’d immediately start solving crimes, fighting terrorists and defending Freedom, but this is a British series, so they immediately start f’ing everything up and rather dark hilarity ensues.

I actually heard about the series a few years back and thought it sounded like something worth checking out. Then I didn’t. But then I stumbled onto the premiere of the second season about a month ago, and have been enjoying it ever since.

I won’t post any real spoilers, but will include an example of dialogue (from the most recent episode aired here) as an example of the general tone…

It was an accident! She was rubbing my cock and and then she starts foaming at the mouth and then she tripped and impaled herself on her Mother Teresa Young Humanitarian of the Year Award!

Yeah, Nathan gets all the best lines πŸ™‚

Oh hey, here’s the trailer.

Friday nights on ABC people! Be there or be a rectangular thing!

Thoughts on “Visitation”

Poor, poor Eli…

You know, Eli doesn’t have much luck with women. First he falls for a girl who just wants to be friends (and starts turning into an alien), then he falls for a girl who gets murdered, then he starts chatting up another girl and her head explodes.

Seriously, the women on Destiny would be well advised to keep their distance. The guy’s a major jinx.

Four Weddings and a Precious

Stupid Fat Hobbits!

Four Weddings is not a show I would consider watching in a million years, but the preview clip that’s been doing the rounds is hilarious.

Things I want to know…

a) Where in Hades did they dig up a Gollum impersonator?
b) How are the other brides completely unaware of who Gollum is?
c) Why do the other brides seem to think that theyΒ  have a right to complain about the wedding being “ruined” by having Gollum there? You know, given that it’s not actually their wedding?

And – for the record – while I think this is hilarious I would not invite Gollum to my wedding πŸ™‚

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