Author: Purple Wyrm

One of the strangest known sapient species of Local Probability are the beings known as Goatsuckers or (by those who find the name undignified or unpleasant) Caprisugiformes.

The body of a goatsucker resembles a sucker from an octopus or squid’s tentacle, made of a firm, white jelly, standing about a metre tall. A tail of coarse white hair, somewhat similar in form to that of a horse, extends from one side of the body, and a flexible neck of what appears to be cartilage extends from the opposite side. On the end of the neck is a head of what appears to be bone, strongly resembling an elongated goat skull with horns and prominent teeth. A blue glow is present in the eye sockets.

Goatsuckers possess prodigious metaphysical abilities, casually performing feats of telepathy and telekinesis that would tax the abilities of even the most talented practitioners of other species. While the upper limits of their abilities are unknown there is a famous instance of a single goatsucker telekinetically demolishing a four story brick building and neatly stacking its sorted components 350 metres away in under ten seconds, while apparently expending no particular effort to do so. Performing such a task in such a short period is considered impossible for even a skilled and practiced team of non-goatsucker Metaphysicians, let alone a single practitioner.

The biology and society of the goatsuckers is little known as they typically respond to enquiries about such matters with polite but firm refusal. They are not known to eat or drink and do not seem to possess the anatomy to do either. They do not appear to breathe, although some form of passive respiration cannot be ruled out. They do not possess organs of speech, but easily communicate via telepathy or telekinetic sound production. It is unknown if they are vulnerable to any weapons, as all known attempts to harm a goatsucker have been met with the instantaneous deployment of ludicrously powerful telekinetic shields.

Goatsuckers do not appear to have gender, or even a concept of gender – although some have adopted gendered pronouns to ease interaction with gendered species. The closest they seem to come to a concept of personal names is the use of adjectives – when asked for a name a goatsucker may reply with something like ‘fearsome’, ‘maximum’, ‘intelligent’ or ‘green’. This has lead to the practice of formally referring to individuals as “The [adjective] Goatsucker”, a practice the species seems to be entirely content with.

Their home world – generally referred to simply as ‘Goatsucker’ – is an arid planet of plains, deserts and salt flats with one small, saline sea. The goatsuckers live in tunnel complexes, but the social structure – if any – of these settlements is completely unknown.

Despite their overall strangeness and frankly terrifying levels of metaphysical power the goatsuckers are seen as a benign and on occasion even helpful species. There is not a single record of hostile action from a goatsucker, and all occasions of attempted harm against them have been instantly and calmly neutralised, with no attempt at retaliation. A number of goatsuckers have joined the Metaphysicians Guild, and have served on various government and private bodies throughout Local Probability, although their reasons for doing so remain completely unknown.